Sir Nigel Haversmith IV

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A rare portrait of Sir Nigel at age 5, sans monocle and top hat.
A rare portrait of Sir Nigel at age 5, sans monocle and top hat.

Sir Nigel Haversmith The Fourth is an English comedian best known for his work on The Rubber Chicken Podcast

Sir Nigel is voiced by Tim Morrison.

Contents

Personal Life

Sir Nigel's very existence proves that upper-class sensibilities transcend actual wealth. He has no known money to speak of, and nobody has dared ask how came to own a clean suit, cane and monocle.

Little is known about his early life, although newly located excerpts from his unpublished biography (scrawled on a discarded napkin) reveal he began his career as a comedian at 28, when he found a dictionary in a dumpster and opened it to find the entry on "humour". Half the definition was obscured by a ketchup stain, but this did not deter him from his self-proclaimed "true calling".

In 2003 he changed his first name to "Sir" by deed poll. Ironically, he had already been knighted the previous decade (a process most British citizens are forced to endure).

Any talk of blood relation to the similarly-moustached Podcast Announcer is purely speculative.

Comedy Style

Sir Nigel's technique is inevitably centred on the most obvious possible punchline for any given subject matter. More often than not, he will distill the joke to a simple factual statement, stripped of genuine comedic delivery. On other occasions he will misinterpret the essence of the joke entirely, rendering the punchline ineffective.

Only unconsciousness will stop him laughing at his own jokes.

"Weekly" Segment

Nigel maintained a consistent presence throughout season one (excluding the post-finale Christmas Special), starting with his Weekly Video Gaming Joke. After four episodes, he had exhausted his supply of observations about the medium and moved on to aeroplane food. This lasted only two episodes before he finally resorted to charades. (Answer: Popular X-Box Game Halo).

Current Status

Dead or alive? YOU DECIDE.
Dead or alive? YOU DECIDE.

Nigel was fired from the podcast after the first season, as chronicled in Episode 203: King Podcast & The Knights of the Roundtable (which chronologically takes place between seasons one and two). Even after his unceremonious sacking, he was all too happy to return with untimely and unwanted witticisms. An equally unceremonious shooting from Mister Bung proved marginally more effective in shutting him up.

The show's second season logo depicts a gravestone marked "Nigel Haversmith IV". Whether this constitutes factual canon or merely a symbolic "death" representing a new start free of existing running gags is unclear. However, as several Rubber Chicken writers have recently reported empty burning paper bags left on their doorsteps and distant cries of "ho ho, very witty, very witty", it is unlikely Nigel Haversmith is gone for good, however much his fellow contributors might wish otherwise.

Nigel is also presently moonlighting as the most recent incarnation of British supervillain Professor Moriarty, nemesis and comic foil for Hardcore Holmes.

External Links

Sony E3 2006 Press Conference in One Minute

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